I got Rudy and Margot on August 24, 1993, my twentieth birthday. They were just barely six weeks old and were so tiny you could hold them both in one hand. Despite his tiny size, I suspected that Rudy would grow to be huge because of his giant bat-like ears and big, wide paws. His constant purring as a kitten earned him the name Evinrude after the boat motor company. He purred when he played, he purred when you petted him, he purred when he ate…He was truly a little motor.

Rudy did indeed grow into those big ears and feet. My old vet used to call everyone into the room when I brought Rudy in just to marvel at his magnificence. His body alone was a good two feet long, and with his tail, he was over three feet long. I used to say that he was much more like a dog or a small pony than a cat. I cannot begin to count the times I heard people say, "That is the BIGGEST cat I have ever seen!"

And he was beautiful-a sleek, regal, majestic creature carpeted in the most lush, frosty silver fur I have ever seen. But Rudy's physical presence was matched in greatness by his incredible personality. How did I get so lucky to be blessed with this cat so full of boundless love, perpetual sociability, astounding intelligence, and a surprising sense of humor?

He was a true companion cat, following me from room to room, patiently waiting on the bathmat for me to get out of the shower every morning. Always a social creature, rather than eat alone, Rudy would bring his dry food, one mouthful at a time, into whatever room I was in and often left a few kibbles in my shoes or my backpack ("packing me a lunch," I liked to think).

Rudy converted the cat-hater to the cat-lover. Rudy answered phones. Rudy turned lights on and off. Rudy opened doors. As one old roommate once said, "If Rudy had opposable thumbs, he would take over the world."

Rudy absolutely loved attention and loved to be petted. When he jumped into your lap, he turned into putty and was the most malleable and relaxed cat I have ever met. He let me play with his feet and even let me play with his little kitty lips and teeth! Rudy loved to sleep close to my face, often tugging or pawing lightly at my hair ("my stylist"), and always, always, always wanted to be in physical contact, even if just by a paw on my leg. I took such comfort in snuggling with that big, beautiful cat.

For the last nine and a half years, Rudy and Margot have been my joys, my friends, my babies. About six months ago, I noticed that Rudy had lost some weight, but I didn't really think too much of it as he continued to eat heartily and play with Margot. Then he began demanding water all the time, constantly jumping on the sink when I turned on the faucet. Rudy had always had a thing about playing with water, so I thought that maybe this was just a new twist to his life-long love of water sports. I bought him a fountain thinking that the constant running of fresh water would sate him.

I also noticed that Rudy and Margot had stopped sleeping curled up together as they had their entire lives. For years, they spent so much time with their arms around each other's necks that I was convinced that they were constantly trying out poses for some sort of "Cutest Cats Ever" contest. Friends always teased me for taking so many pictures of them, but I figured that if they were going to pose, I was going to take pictures!

Then about 6 weeks ago, Rudy developed a cold, and I decided that it was time to take him to the vet. The vet informed me that Rudy had actually lost a third of his body weight and that his demands for water stemmed from dehydration. The x-rays and blood work showed that Rudy was in an advanced stage of renal failure.

I tried everything to keep that beautiful kitty comfortable. I gave him sub-Qs at home, changed his food, put him on antibiotics, gave him Tagamet and read everything I could find about feline renal failure, but nothing in the world could keep his little kidneys going.

The week after Thanksgiving, he began needing fluids every day and then stopped eating and drinking. He was so frail and so weak and looked as though it pained him to sit down.

I had always sworn to myself that I would never let him suffer. On the morning of Monday, December 9th, I made the first of two incredibly painful phone calls that I would make in the next 24 hours. I called the vet and made an appointment to have Rudy put to sleep at 4:15 the following day. He never made it until then.

At around 2:30am Tuesday morning, I awoke to find Rudy too weak even to stand, and with two very mournful cries, he looked me in the eye and told me that he could take no more.

Thanks to my very kind veterinarian who took my hysterical call in the middle of the night and met me at the vet, Rudy died quickly and peacefully with me by his side at around 3:45am.

It has only been a few days, but it hurts so much. I keep expecting to see him come strolling out of the kitchen, walking with that lion's swagger that he always had. Margot keeps looking around for him.

He gave me nine and a half years of pure joy.

I loved that cat.

He will be missed.

Melanie
shangri_lalala@yahoo.com