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Bootsie
Unknown - June 14, 2000
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My dearest Bootsie.
I would like to borrow a portion from the poem "The Cremation of Sam McGee" by Robert Service from his collection of poems entitled "The Spell of The Yukon"
"Now a promise made is a debt unpaid and the trail has its own stern code", etc.
Bootsie, I made a promise to you just before Dr. Guinan made his house call and that promise was to write a tribute befitting such a wonderful partner like yourself. Today Bootsie it's Christmas and it is the first Christmas in about nine years that we have not been together. I made the decision yesterday that on this day, I would complete what I promised to do. I have attempted many times to write this tribute but it just makes me so sad that tears come to my eyes and that is what is happening at this moment. I apologize Bootsie for not completing it sooner.
In many ways, it seems like light years ago and in many
ways, it seems just like yesterday when you left me. I can vividly remember
when 
you
first appeared at my door. You came right out of nowhere, walked right on
in and just made yourself at home and it wasn't long before you made a home
in my heart. Kathleen named you Bootsie because of your four white paws.
It wasn't long before you would jump up on my lap, then crawl up on my shoulder and lay wedged against my neck while I watched TV. As you remember, it was but a short time later when my outside cat Misty had three kittens and I brought two of them inside for company. Kathleen named all of the kitties (Sunshine, Taffy and Rocky) and she took Rocky to live with her. I never dreamed that you and Sunshine would become such bosom buddies. There wasn't a day in all of those years that you and Sunshine wouldn't be sleeping together or grooming one another. It was truly a sight to behold.
Bootsie, you had some very special traits that must have carried over from whatever household you came from. In particular, whenever I would start the washing machine, you would come running and stand in front of the machine and gaze in amazement at the laundry going round and round. When you approached your water bowl, for some inexplicable reason, you would place your paw in the bowl before taking a drink. And how about those "num nums" which you consumed with gusto.
The years sped by, much faster than I care to mention and we had such wonderful times together but in April, clouds appeared on the horizon. As any pet partner knows, the signs of CRF are slow to appear and before I was cognizant of your condition, we were in trouble. You and I, Bootsie, went through all of the procedures known to CRF kitties. You were so good about taking the fluid but no matter what I did or fed you, you just wouldn't eat. On my last visit to the vet, Dr. Guinan suggested that I should consider the option of putting you to sleep. I fought that option off for as long as I possibly could and finally came to the realization that your life was no longer what it once was and never would be again. I even made a date with myself to take you in but when that time came, I just couldn't do it. However, your condition deteriorated rapidly and with the emotional support of my friends Ron & June Evans, I finally made the decision to take your life. Bootsie, I was sixty nine years old and I can tell unequivocally that it was the toughest decision I have ever made in my life. The reasoning side of my brain said that I made the appropriate decision. The other side wonders if I did the right thing.
I just couldn't bring myself to let you expire on a stainless steel table. My thoughts were to have you leave me in the loving atmosphere of our home. I was fortunate in that Dr. Guinan said if I gave him ample time, he would make a house call. In the mean time Bootsie I wrote you two long letters which I read to you in their entirety just before Dr. Guinan arrived. I'm sorry Bootsie but I cried the whole time I read the letters to you and all through the final procedure. Dr. Guinan held the stethoscope to your heart and told me when it was all over and I will remember this date, June 14, 2000 at 1524 hours for as long as I live on this earth. When your heart beat its last beat, a part of me died with you. Your body was so limp that I had difficulty placing my hands under you to lift you up and carry you up my driveway to his car. With my eyes full of tears, I waved a final good-by to you.
Unfortunately for me, time has not healed my wounds. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think of you. Sunshine would not sleep with me for over three weeks after your departure. He missed you so much. I decided to have you cremated so that you could be with me always and your ashes are in a nice redwood box with your name plate on the top. Upon my demise, I have instructed the executor of my will to mix your ashes with mine and scatter them to the wind. Hopefully Bootsie, those ashes will descend on Rainbow Bridge and we will be together once again.
And last but not least, I would like to offer my sincerest appreciation to Dr. Guinan of The Morris Vet Clinic for making a house call and conducting what he had to do in such a professional and caring manner. Thank you Dr. Guinan.
And so Bootsie, this is the conclusion of my promised tribute to you. I was truly blessed by your presence and I still miss you so. I recently acquired a CD, The World of Chas & Dave and one of the selections is entitled "I Miss You Girl". On this Christmas day, December 25, 2000, all I can say is, I miss you girl.
Bernie J. Downs
w8vnf@greenapple.com